Life is Pain when living with ongoing, seemingly never-ending discomfort leaving a person extremely hesitant to receive “advice.” This isn’t because it’s not appreciated, but rather it can be internalized in ways other than how it might have been intended;
For example
Just because a remedy has been declared for something [aspirin for a headache, etc.] or you may even know someone whose symptoms improved for whatever reason [with essential oils or dietary changes, etc.] though I do not intend to question the merit of these claims, this doesn’t mean the same holds for others.
The Process
The medical pursuit is a process requiring time and often causes much frustration, as there is no possible way to comprehend the experience of another without having lived it, and even the “same” or very similar situation is different for each individual–
The hardships themselves might correlate, but the fundamental + physiological cause and thereby approach needs to be patient-centered, carefully assessed + taken into individual consideration, thus a reason as to why diagnosing/treating conditions is such a difficult task, and this also uplifts the importance in being our own best advocate as well as doctor, because we know our bodies best considering we live in them.
Rest assured that I’m not here to provide advice but rather a few things I’ve learned along the way…
At this point in my healing journey, I strive to be a Solution based thinker. It’s bittersweet that there have been so many years to work on coping mechanisms. However, I’ve chosen to attempt more than solely ‘coping’, despite the fact that’s half of the persistent battle because there’s little reason to think that my disorders will ever be cured logically, but that doesn’t stop me from believing in the possibility.
In the meantime
I have found that it’s most productive for me to focus on what’s within my control; what is most helpful, what could improve the circumstances as they come moment by moment, and how to ultimately give back in whatever ways I’m able. The same reflections/lessons/knowledge/wisdom that I’ve gained equally + rightfully belong to whomever else could benefit.
︎ I don’t believe living this way ever gets any “easier.”
We get tougher, more resilient– partly by force, but we need not fixate on it through those perceptions – that’s where things boil down to being about the matter of ‘choices.’
What we are going through isn’t necessarily something we brought onto ourselves, deserve, or is in no way improved by assigning blame/fault– there does come a time we’ll meet ourselves at a crossroads and be faced with the decision- to either continue on this route we’ve been on or possibly alter our direction, even if it means cultivation of a new path altogether.
︎ Demand joy for yourself, no one else can for you… For only a three-letter word, this one is profoundly vast. . Some of us have *lost* what made our hearts sing; many aren’t able to light their soul on fire the way they once did or perhaps wanted to.
One part about being [chronically] ill that’s often disregarded + overlooked, is the grief and mourning… The attempt at the quality of life is constantly bombarded by unwelcome intruders, whether bodily aches or intrusive thoughts. Life doesn’t have to be perfect or even look the way we want it to to be meaningful; there’s power in harnessing our blessings; and I’ve found that the more I find to be grateful for, the more there is to be found.
In a sense, I find thankfulness within each difficulty because I wouldn’t be who I am without the struggles… It wasn’t possible for me to grow in a love affair with myself yet also willingly possess animosity toward what shaped my identity. . A coexistence between the acknowledgment of what’s going on without fully or permanently committing to any particular specific circumstance can lead to less judgment both inwardly + out.
In Conclusion
Contentment vs. Happiness: take bits of “good” or create it yourself… Find balance with the “bad”.. Release the urge to label things one way or another and instead try merely observing with child-like curiosity.
Article Author: M.Mays
Published by International PainFoundation, iPain Blog, TeamiPain
